Would Jesus drive an SUV? The www reliably informs me that this is the title of a sermon delivered by a certain Donel McClellan of the First Congregational United Church of Christ, Washington in 2001 (Read it at http://fccbucc.pair.com/would_jesus_drive_an_suv.htm; it's fun). Much like the theme of the sermon indicates, sports utility vehicles are in a spot of bother in the US. Tree-hugging types complain that they burn too much fuel. The greens have better fish to fry in India (like cola companies).

In layspeak, utes (as they are known) are vehicles with the comfort of a sedan, more space, and a bit of off-road attitude to boot. The operative word is 'bit': You have to be close to insane to take one on a cross-country excursion. Still, an ute is the ultimate phallic symbol: tonnes of beefy car, big alloy wheels, large headlamps, oversize tyres, and oodles of engine power that will never be used.

In India, you get to choose from Suzuki's Grand Vitara XL-7, Hyundai's Terracan, Honda CRV and Chevrolet Forrester. Each is priced between Rs 15 lakh and Rs 20 lakh. Only the Hyundai has a diesel engine (a 2.9 litre one). This is competent, but it doesn't make for the most exhilarating drive going. The firm says it will soon supplement this engine with a 200 hp, 3.5 litre V6 one. That should help. Despite that, Terracan is the most muscular ute available in the country today. This is a bare-chested monster Tarzan would have picked. Honda CRV looks good, but falls a little short on the machismo front. Methinks this is a muscled man with a sexuality crisis. Still, its understatedness and price may appeal to someone who wants to shop for groceries. Chevrolet Forrester is the teenager of the pack. It is tech-savvy; its permanent all-wheel drive forgives mistakes easily; and it boasts the same parentage as the Subaru Impreza World Rally car. Downside: it looks like a station-wagon on steroids.

Then, there's the Grand Vitara. I drove one for a week and it's still showing in my fuel budget. The 2.7 litre V6 engine guzzles gas, but has a nice deep-chested sound. This SUV is also the only Euro-NCAP five-star rated vehicle in its class; that means it is safe, very safe. And it is fast. The best thing about an SUV is the seating position: way above ground, and far higher than mere mortals in sedans. That's one reason women drivers in India should consider these vehicles; on might-is-right Indian roads an ute spells R-E-S-P-E-C-T.

-Kushan Mitra

The SUV Test
5 questions that will test your SUV-ness

How rich are you?

a. Own large industrial group
b. Have Rs 8 crore stashed in bank locker
c. Politician (enough said)
d. Can't afford a bus-ticket

Your off-road ability?

a. Participated in Paris-Dakar rally
b. Discovered tribes in inner Amazonia
c. Drove to the top of Matterhorn
d. Love urban canyons

Your idea of speed?

a. C = Speed of light
b. Mach 2
c. President of local Michael Schumacher fan club
d. Cycle-rickshaw races

Your environmental consciousness?

a. Own polluting industrial plant
b. Own rare mahogany furniture
c. Have (genuine) leopard-skin tights
d. Hugged a tree

What dog do you own?

a. Rottweiler
b. Labrador
c. German shepherd
d. Spitz

If you answered d) for any question go get yourself one of those fancy-new Segway scooters

HEALTH NOTES
Information Overkill: Oil

Quick, my attention span is a few lines of text, which is the healthiest cooking oil going?

It has to be soybean. This has the ideal n6:n3 ratio. That's the ratio of omega six fats to omega three fats; understanding the omega number in acids will require an advanced knowledge of organic chemistry; suffice it to say that most people consume far more omega six fats and far less omega three fats than they should. Given that omega three fats have a host of benefits-they reduce the risk of heart disease, cancer, and some immune-system disorders-this isn't good. Soybean oil has an n6:n3 ratio of 7:1. "It lowers both the total cholesterol and the low density lipoprotein (LDL) levels, and is rich in phytoestrogens and isoflavones that inhibit growth of breast cancer cells," says Dr. K. Srinath Reddy, a professor of cardiology at New Delhi's All India Institute of Medical Sciences.

I am a traditionalist and can't stand to have my food cooked in anything but mustard oil. Is that alright?

The good news is that mustard oil is almost as good as soybean oil. The bad news is that most Indian manufacturers sell mustard oil that has a high level of erusic acid. That could cause, or, at the least, accelerate the onset of cardiac ailments.

What's the PUFA:SFA ratio and should I worry about this?

First things first: SFA stands for saturated fatty acids and PUFA for poly unsaturated fatty acids. In the nature of answers to the best Zen riddles, you should and you shouldn't. The Americans were at the vanguard of the lets-move-to-PUFA wave. They belonged there; Indians, however, have always consumed enough vegetables and vegetable oils (the source of PUFA). And by aping American diets we actually started consuming too much PUFA. With an N6:N3 ratio around 130:1, PUFA oils should be had in moderation. So, yes, focus on having enough (not more) PUFA, but as long as you keep an eye on the n6:n3 ratio forget the PUFA:SFA one.

On the internet I came across reams of stuff on how olive oil is good for health. Should I move to it?

If you can afford it-it isn't cheap, you know-yes. Still, our advice to you would be to surf some more. The benefits of olive oil may well be overstated. The New England Journal of Medicine says that while a Mediterranean diet lowers risk of heart attack and cancer, this is because of the diet as a whole. Ergo, it isn't just the olive oil, but whole grains, nuts, fish, and fruits.

Last question. Heard of sesame oil?

Yes we have, and most people from South India swear by it. This may well be the best medium for frying because it has antioxidants (think of them as fat busters) that don't break down at high temperatures. Still, this oil is high in omega six fats, so exclusive use isn't recommended. Actually, that's true of all oils. Mix-and-match is the way to be.

-Payal Sethi

HEALTH SNIPPETS

NUTS-N-BOLTS SOLUTION
Fish and fish oil, we all know, reduce the risk of heart disease. Do you know that nuts do more? Nuts such as almonds, peanuts, and pistachios are high in unsaturated fatty acids, fibre, vitamin E, and magnesium. An Adventist Health study shows that the incidence of heart disease goes down by upto 60 per cent in those people who consume nuts everyday.

THE BLUES HAVE IT
Goodbye botox. Hello blueberry pie. Blueberries could well be the miracle cure for ageing. Nicholas V. Perricone, a dermatologist who is professor of medicine at Michigan State University, claims blueberries, strawberries, cranberries, and raspberries are loaded with antioxidants that save cells from premature ageing.